crazyparakiss | Feb. 16th, 2011

Does it amaze you? To know that some people become extremely strict or critical in fandom?

Maybe it's just me, but I like to think of this place as an escape from the craziness of my life. I don't want to be critical and strict. I don't want to take this so seriously that I lose sight of why I came in the first place.

That doesn't mean that I don't like to read quality fic, or look at quality art. I do, won't lie, and I am not fond of bad fic. But you know what, I read it. Wanna know why? Because we all have to start somewhere. If I find something that I believe should be worked on I send a PM, because embarrassing someone on the internet is asinine and a cowardly way to be cruel.

True, I can't remember if I have here or not, I've ranted about the fics that have made my eyes bleed. Either from predictability, jumping pov, Mary-Sue/Gary-Stu, over use of the word EMERALD or SILVER to describe eye color. I could go on and on and on. But I won't hold it against anyone, we aren't all "real" authors. We're beginners, sometimes not, and beginners should have encouragement.

Perhaps this is the idealistic, future art teacher/developing artist in me. I believe in streghtening creativity, even if the imaginations of some are limited, and if that creativity stinks. I just remind myself of when I was little. I painted my Nana's walls with horrid renditions of Sailor Moon, and told her one day I'd be an artist. Even though she didn't really believe me, but she encouraged me. Smiled and said, "You can do and be anything you want to be." When I got older, and started taking first in the state still life's and water color contests my BFN school held against other BFN contests, Nana told me, "I didn't ever really think you'd be a good painter or be a decent hand at drawing," she laughed and I was a little shocked, "but look at you know, from unformed blobs of color to detailed pencils of fruit baskets with twine spools and other odds and ends. A metal to take home, and a trophy for the school because of your group's efforts." She kissed my head and said, "I love you, and remember no matter how terrible you might be in the beginning, you can become brilliant if you never give up."

I live by that. Always have and always will. I believe in myself, and I encourage everyone to believe in themselves. I have my tangents of depression and my moments of self doubt. I was a horrible writer once, I can admit it. I still have the two terrible fics, and sometimes I read them, and in a weird was I still love them. They were the beginning of this. I'm not so bad now. I've my days, the days where I am sure a lot of people in these communities with to slit my throat if only to make me stop writing, "less than adequate" dribble. Fuck em. I'm still here and I will stay here, and I won't be overly serious because that will make my hair fall out. I could improve my grammatical skills. I know. I hardly ever use a beta. Horrible, I know. And I've had plenty of "WTF" comments on an array of my stories. Some people who are truly curious, and others who troll fics just waiting to say something rude. The latter are the ones I pity, it is hard enough not being liked in RL but when you bring it to fandom it is rather tragic and makes them awkward to a point of loneliness.

And seeing as how I am rambling, again, I will not go. I just wanted to say, "Chill out, don't sweat the small stuff." Don't let someone else's bumbling creativity offend you to the point where you cannot go to sleep at night. If it bothers you that much, PM them give them advice and go on your merry way.